From my last post, you guys know that I've just about had it with my company. I have since been looking around for another job, or rather another company as I quite like my job but just hate my company (and my bitch ass boss) like hell. It's not that I WANT to leave my company just as yet, but I figure I'd better keep my options open just in case shit hits the fan.

 

Websites like jobsandmore.com and and jobstreet have not been particularly helpful..and if there was an opening it would be hella competitive to fulfill that vacancy as well. But I just enjoy looking thru those sites...particularly looking at the many different types of jobs out there in the market.

 

So I'm just scanning thru and came across many senior positions like Managing Director, General Manager, Senior Manager..etc. No, I'm not gonna apply for those, but I'm just thinkin why all these different names when it's actually just 'BOSS'. That's what the people under you are gonna call you anyway once you're hired. I see no difference unless they wanna put it as 'Boss 1' or 'Boss 2' of the company.

 

Althought I'm pretty stressed out currently over work, I still like to look at the lighter side of things. I'm thinkin what if I just went into an interview and say 'Hi, I'm here for an interview to fill the position as BOSS'. Or what if I just called up a company and say 'Hi, is there any openings to be a Boss?'.

 

It'll be kinda cool to be a boss. I'm hoping to reach that stage later in my life, but wouldn't it be cool if I were the boss rite now? I think I'll be the coolest boss around town, one who yells 'FUCK YOUR MOTHER!!!' everytime my subordinate does something wrong. It'll be kinda cool to be called 'BOSS' as well, for a change.

 

Maybe I CAN be called BOSS rite now. But I'll have to apply for a job as a waiter in a mamak restaurant. Customers will start calling me 'BOSS, teh tarik satu!!'.

At times, I wonder whether it's all worth it.

 

I'm getting sick of it all and  I don't really know when will it all end...or how much more of this shit I can take. God damn I know I'm paying my dues, and I don't really have a problem with that. But all I want to know whether there IS a light at the end of this fuckin tunnel? I ain't gonna work my muthafuckin ass off if it means shit in the end. And it don't look too good right now.

 

I always tell myself my time will come, but fuck, if I don't even get recognition for all the shit I do, will it really come? At least with this organisation I'm with right now? I work my muthafuckin ass off and all I get is a pat on my back. I feel no love or appreciation for what I do...and past experiences (or colleagues) tell me that it will NEVER be appreciated.

 

I don't wanna be bitchin too much cos I've been with them thru thick and thin...and I really appreciate them for everything they've taught me. And I probably show my gratitude by putting up with whatever shit they throw at me. I've been thru a time where I felt like I was the only one who working and they trusted me with everything. I mean, it's humbling that they put quite alot of trust in me, but there's a limit to how much I can take. And they should recognise that. It's probably my fault for not speaking out, but damn if they're just taking advantage of me NOT speaking up.

 

I've always thought that I would be the one who can defy history and GROW with this company. I'm starting to realise how fuckin impossible it is and why others have failed. They put me thru so much shit everyday that I can only gather so much strength to put myself into bed and get ready for the next fuckin morning.

 

Their biggest problem is their fuckin arrogance and ignorance. Past complains and critisms have fallen on their deaf fuckin ears. They never seem to wake up and realise that maybe they're wrong and that the reason for their high staff turnover is cos they're FUCKED UP. I mean, if everybody is saying the same thing about you, you gotta at least start realising that it HAS to be somewhat TRUE...and start changing.

 

Friends tell me to be patient and just take this as a stepping stone. All I can say is that its a HUGE test of patience and tolerance.

 

For now, life is fucked up. Everyday, I hide behind a facade. But how much longer can I go on hiding? Surely my efforts are finally gonna pay off init? They are finally gonna recognise how much I contribute and reward me init? There is a light at the end for sure?

 

 

Fuck, who am I kidding.

For the first time last week, I had Korean food. My clients were hosting some lunch for some journalist, and I proposed for it to be held in a Korean restaurant (just to give the whole lunch some Korean atmosphere). So we went to the Koong Jung Restaurant in PNB Darby Park.

 

My colleague and I arrived early, first ones to arrive actually. And since it's we're both Korean-Food-Virgins, we decided to check out the menu first just to know what would be the most appropriate dish to have during a business-lunch meeting.

 

So we approach this nice old lady behind the counter and requested for the menu.

 

"You wanto to looko at the menu-o?"

 

"Yes yes. We have-o aloto of different foodo"

 

Obviously she was Korean. But don't get me wrong though, I ain't making fun of the way they talk. I actually think it's kinda cool, at least they have their own unmistakable identity.

 

So, looking at the menu didnt help us much as we were still clueless about Korean food. So, my colleague decided to play safe and order the Japanese Tempura set while I was a lil more brave and ordered the "Today's Special".

 

So, we're having lunch at I was trying hard not to giggle at my client's weak attempt to speako English. I was also gettin kinda bored as I didnt really know what subject to talk about...and since Korea was already eliminated from the World Cup for playing shit.

 

Then it suddenly popped into my head that the only thing "Korean" I know was Lee Hyori!! But then I hesitated to ask about Lee Hyori at the possibility of me laughin if they reply like "Lee Hyori? Yes yes! Lee Hyori! Dance dance! Shake shake! Lee Hyori!! Wooooo!!"

 

So, I decided not to ask about Lee Hyori. Plus, I didn't think it would be appropriate and professional to talk about it during a business lunch. I just sat there, slurping my noodles (which tasted weird) and attempting to join in the conversation whenever I could.

 

I gotta admit that it was some experience, and I thoroughly enjoyed it! But I don't think I'll ever pay for Korean food, it just ain't that good.