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October 25 Now THIS is a firstI think I either need to change the way I speak, pronounce my words better, or change my damn NAME entirely. This was what transpired over the phone 5 minuts ago:
Me: Hi, may I speak to XXX please?
Operator: Sure. who's on the line?
Me: This is Nigel from RAPR
Operator: Raja Kumar? Sure. Hold on Raja.
WTF. October 12 Talking with: David CopperfieldAs you all should know by now, David Copperfield is making his way to KL at the end of the month. A fan since I was a kid, I had the good fortune of catching up with him and manage to conduct a lil impromptu, casual interview with him. I've always been fascinated by magic and illusion, and even had the ambition of being a magician when I was a stupid lil kid. Anyways, below is what transpired during my meeting with him.
Me: So why did you decide to drop by Malaysia? Is this your first time here?
David Copperfield: I heard the girls here are finnnnne...
Me: Erm...that's the only reason?
DC: Well, to be honest, I heard that you Malaysians are very stupid and gullible and are easy to entertain. So, easy to entertain equals easy money.
Me: Erm...okayyy....moving on. So I read that you're gonna fit yourself into a tiny lil Prada shoebox as one of your acts. How is that even possible?
DC: Come to my show and you'll see.
Me: So are you gonna like shrink yourself or somethin?
DC: *sneaky grin* Maybe
Me: So are you actually able to shrink anything?
DC: Probably, yeah..
Me: I'm sure you heard of the famous PR lady over here right? Are you able to shrink her hips?
DC: HELL NO!! There are some things which are utterly impossible...even for an illusion. I couldn't hide those hips behind the Great Wall if I wanted to!
Me: But didn't you like make the statue of liberty dissapear or somethin?
DC: *gives me the "are you stupid" look* The statue ain't as big as those hips!
Me: *laughs* Okayy... So what are you able to do then? Can you make her more generous?
DC: Son, I think you've got me confused with David the Miracle Worker. I'm an ILLUSIONIST...I ain't a fuckin miracle worker! Listen, if you're gonna ask me stupid questions, then I'm leaving.
Me: Okay okay chill..So instead of just making things dissapear or shrinking them, are you able to make things bigger?
DC: *grins* Why do you think the girls love me?
Me: Okayy... So what do you think of the David Blaine fella? Are you impressed by his shit?
DC: No comment.
Me: Erm...why?
DC: Ok, all I'm gonna say is he has no originality.
Me: What makes you say so?
DC: Lets put it this way...He wanted to copy me SOOO much that he even chose the same first name! I mean, get a life!
Me: Erm...don't you think it's just coincidence? I mean, David's a real common name...
DC: Let me tell you something...When you know about magic and illusion, you will know that there ain't such a thing as coincidence.
Me: Okayyyy....
DC: Any more questions? I gotta run.
Me: Actually, not really. Thanks for your time David!
DC: Anytime kid!
Me: Let's call the waiter and pay for our bill. Could you buy me this round as I think I left my wallet....
DC: *POOF*
Me: .....Where the fuck did he go?
And so I had to settle David's drink. That cheap bastard. October 09 Dedicated to Alex MartinSmells Like Gay Spirit
Load up your gun and tell your friends
He can no longer pretend He never was self assured I always knew he was queer Hello hello hello homo (x 3)
With the lights out, and some penis Here we are now, embrace gayness! With some KY, it feels painless! Here we are now, embrace gayness! Gabriel Chano! Elton Johno! Not a lesbo! But a homo! Gay! He's looking for a tight new ass
And for this gift he feels he's blessed He likes all men, and always been And always will until the end Hello hello hello homo (x 3)
With the lights out, and some penis Here we are now, embrace gayness! With some KY, it feels painless! Here we are now, embrace gayness! Gabriel Chano! Elton Johno! Not a lesbo! But a homo! Gay! And he forgets just why he thought He used to like some tits and some butt He found it hard, its hard to hide The fact he's gay, well, nevermind Hello hello hello homo (x 3)
With the lights out, and some penis Here we are now, embrace gayness! With some KY, it feels painless! Here we are now, embrace gayness! Gabriel Chano! Elton Johno! Not a lesbo! But a homo! Gay! October 01 Random Zen with attitude
It's pretty weird being able to sit in the office today after the whole of the entire last week was spnt either at The Gardens or Boulevard hotel. Its even weirder sitting here with not much to do besides replying some emails. This is how work should be everyday!!
I could definitely get used to this. How long will this last though, is a another question. I'm just hoping for a quiet week at least till AFTER the Raya break. |
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